Stay with me
by Quezacolt
Summary: You got wires, going in, You got wires, coming out of your skin. (SHweir)
1. Chapter one

**Stay with me…**

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**Chapter one**

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**The song is by Athlete, Wires.

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**

**Author's note: Another piece of fiction that is going to turn into a many chapter story. **

**Enjoy!

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**

"Watch out!"

Elizabeth jumped at the yelled warning, standing on her usual balcony, watching as a large ball of white fire sped from the open event horizon, smashing into the wall close to Elizabeth, and causing her and several others in the control room to leap away from the flames.

A hand roughly grabbed her, pushing her out of the way in the direction of the stairs as several more fireballs were hurled through to Atlantis. A large alarm began to sound, as people yelled warnings and screamed, Elizabeth sat where she had been thrown to the ground, watching the active gate, waiting for a team to come piling through.

As several more fiery weapons came pounding through, the man who had pushed her out of the way, quickly fell, shielding her body as he pinned it to the floor with his own, as something exploded over their heads, sending him rolling off her and colliding into one of the many control panels. She scrambled to her knees, watching as the missing team finally fell through, sending bullets back into the event horizon needlessly.

"Turn on the Shield!" She yelled desperately, crawling to the motionless figure near her, flipping him over so she could see his pale face.

"John?" She whispered, slapping his face gently, "John, can you hear me?"

He muttered an unintelligible response.

"Come on John! I need you to wake up. You might have a concussion."

His eyes opened, and she was relieved to see him look at her, both pupils normal size, and his eyes both focused on her face. His arms quickly struggled up and he grabbed her shoulders, pulling her closer until her face was millimeters from his own.

"You okay?" He asked quietly, as she felt his hot breath against her cheek. She flushed red.

"I'm fine." She whispered, just as quiet, pulling herself straight and helping him sit up, leaning against the panel. "I'm more worried about you."

He laughed slightly.

"Fighting fit." He whispered, his voice crackly, "Just a little dizzy. Nothing our good doctor can't fix."

She nodded, reaching out and cupping his face with one hand, the other roaming along his chest, under his vest, searching for signs of broken skin.

He laughed slightly, wheezing, pulling her hands away. Only then she noticed the blood spread along her fingers.

"Oh god John!" She cried out, raising her head to where people were slowly pulling themselves off the floor, "I need a med team!" Several people stopped and looked, before Grodin talked quickly into his microphone and nodded.

She turned her attention back to the Major, and carefully unzipped his vest, pulling it off, noticing his eyes had gone slightly glassy.

"Stay with me John." She whispered, focusing on unzipping his jacket and raising his shirt to get a good look at the wound.

He hissed slightly in pain as she gasped at the sign of the blood across his chest.

"Hey…" He whispered, smiling slightly at her, "Can't you wait until our first date before you start trying to rip my clothes off me?"

Elizabeth answered with a smile.

"John Sheppard, I'm just returning to favor after you stole my pajamas last week while I was in the shower. I had to walk the halls of Atlantis in nothing but a towel until I got back to my quarters! I'll never live it down."

John smiled at the memory.

"Well, you shot me in the shoulder. I think we're even!"

Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

"Come on! I was taken over by an evil ancient!"

John nodded feebly.

"Yeah. That's what they all say before they try to kill you."

Elizabeth pressed her hand against him wound, stemming the blood flow as he winced. His eyes began to flutter shut.

"Stay with me John." She whispered, cupping his face with her free palm. He nodded weakly.

"Stay with you…forever…" He whispered, sinking into a painless oblivion.

Elizabeth tapped his cheek, trying to reawaken him, but after several minutes it became apparent he was out for the count.

"Elizabeth?" Gentle hands pulled her away, and she noticed the med team had arrived, as they began cleaning the Major up, and as they all went to work, leaving her standing awkwardly away, she looked at her hands, covered in his blood, her top stained with damp, warm blood, she couldn't help but think one thing in her quiet hysteria.

Those stains would never come out.

Before her eyes rolled back into her head, her knees buckled, and Elizabeth too, fell into oblivion.

* * *

_You got wires, going in_

You got wires, coming out of your skin

You got tears, making tracks

I got tears, that are scared of the facts

When Elizabeth opened her eyes, she was surprised to find Carson watching her intently.

"Elizabeth…?" He asked, helping her as she sat up in the infirmary bed. She noticed she had been changed into scrubs.

"Carson? What's going on?"

He shook his head, leaning back.

"You fainted lass. I had a nurse change you outta your bloody clothes. I thought it might be nicer to wake up without them."

She nodded, looking at her hands. Remembering the blood. John's blood.

"What happened to the Major?" She asked, looking and frowning at all the empty beds. Carson nodded and stood up from the chair he was sitting, indicating she should follow. Scrambling off the bed, she quickly caught up, as they left the infirmary main section, down a small set of stairs.

_Running down corridors_

Through automatic doors

Got to get to you, got to see this through

I see hope is here, in a plastic box

I've seen christmas lights, reflect in your eyes

"Where are we going Carson?" She asked, not recognizing the corridor.

"This," He said, waving with his hand, "is the other section of the infirmary we found later. It has single rooms, like cells, but for medical purposes. We made a few of them into rooms for the critical patients, and he rest are isolation medical rooms."

Elizabeth blanched slightly.

"So why's John down here?"

Carson side-glanced at her.

"Elizabeth." He said soothingly, stopping and grabbing her elbow, pulling her to halt also.

"John is critical."

Elizabeth nodded, swallowing the bile gathering in her throat.

_It was her fault. All her fault…_

As they began to walk again, Carson led the way to one of the many glasses enclosures. Inside, Elizabeth took one glance, before the rest of Atlantis fell away, her hand raised to her mouth and she stared in shock. John was buried, amidst hundreds of wires, his frame, usually so commanding and imposing, pale and sickly.

_You got wires, going in_

You got wires, coming out of your skin

There's dry blood, on your wrist

Your dry blood, on my fingertip

"He had some major injuries Elizabeth." Carson said gently, "The explosion shattered several of his ribs. It ripped open his skin and the force bruised his liver. One of his ribs punctured a lung…"

Elizabeth stopped listening, walking past him and through the glass door inside. They constant beep of the heart monitor calmed her jagged nerves slightly.

She pulled up a chair, and dug her way through the silver wires until she felt his hand.

"John…" She whispered so only he could hear, "Come back. You said you would stay with me forever…" She kissed his hand and moved slightly, settling for a long wait.

* * *

John was floating through inky darkness. He felt astral, out of body. He could remember what happened last, he had been diving into the dam back home with his brother James…Then he had fallen. He remembered that clearly. He had fallen from the diving rock. And as his brother had pulled him from the water, pain had ripped through his body, and he had fallen unconscious. 

So where was he now?

Was he home?

Where was his mother?

* * *

Ford looked through the window to where John was lying, pale and sick. He had heard what had happened when Markham's team had returned. It surprised him that Doctor Weir had not been anywhere, or even been around to hold the briefing. She had been alone, here. With John Sheppard.

_Running down corridors_

Through automatic doors   
Got to get to you, got to see this through

First night of your life, curled up on your own

Looking at you now, you would never know

Aiden had taken control, organized a briefing in their leaders absence, and with Teyla and McKay's help, gotten Atlantis running efficiently once again.

He knocked on the glass.

"Doctor Weir?" He whispered, realizing taking a step into the med lab was like taking a step into a dying persons house.

Pushing the thought away as soon as it had come, he walked to her side.

"Do you need anything Doctor Weir?" He asked gently, looking for a brief second at the pink scrubs she was wearing.

She squeezed his hand.

"I want John to come back. But he seems to be taking his sweet time, so I could use some BDU's from my quarters….if it's okay?"

He nodded and smiled.

"And for what's it's worth ma'am," The smile sliding from his face, "He'll be alright. I don't know anyone stronger."

Actually he did. Elizabeth gave John's inner strength a run for it's money. Aiden supposed that was why they were such a good couple.

She nodded, planting a fake, reassuring smile on her face.

"Sure he will…Sure he will…"

_I see it in your eyes_

I see it in your eyes

You'll be alright

* * *

Ford entered Elizabeth's quarters fifteen minutes later, slightly anxious and nervous. As far as he knew, no one had been in here alone before, or for a matter of fact, no one had been in here. Full stop. Her room was moderately neat, the bed made, but with crinkles were she had slept without using the covers. Books littered the floor, some open and other closed, her desk in the corner was covered in papers and Ford felt drawn there, picking up the notepad. It was empty, but the writing that had been on the previous page was still visible as dents in the page. 

_To John, _

_I was h__oping we could get together tonight? Dinner on the balcony perhaps? We need to talk. More so, I need to talk. I need to tell you how I feel._

_From Elizabeth_

Putting it down, his hands were shaking. He had suspected Elizabeth and John loved each other.

This just proved it.

Turning, he noticed pictures pinned to Elizabeth's headboard. Not feeling ashamed at snooping, (He realised this may be the only time he could come in and out of here and still be alive by the end of it) looked at several pictures, one of Ford and Teyla in the decks, a few from Earth, he raised his eyebrows as he looked at all the ones of John and Elizabeth, they covered over half of the board. He smiled at one of them, Elizabeth on John's shoulders. Everyone could tell she was beyond drunk.

It was a rare occasion where the real Elizabeth Weir had shined through her high armor.

Noticing a small pile of folded clothes on her dresser, he thanked whatever gods that would listen, happy not to be searching through her draws, and scuttled from the room.

* * *

Elizabeth rubbed her thumb over the back of John's hand, when a soft moan escaped him. Climbing to her feet, she looked into his eyes, feeling her heart swell with hope, and watched his eyes flutter open.

_I see it in your eyes_

I see it in your eyes

You'll be alright

Alright

"John?" She whispered. He looked at her.

She looker at him.

He screamed.

_Running ... down corridors, through, automatic doors,_

Got to get to you, got to see this through,

I see hope is here, in a plastic box,

I've seen christmas lights, reflect in your eyes,

_Down corridors, through automatic doors,_

Got to get to you, got to see this through,

First night of your life, curled up on your own,

Looking at you now, you would never know

Ttfn!


	2. Chapter two

Stay with me.

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Chapter two.

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Author's note: Hey guys! Thanks for the fantastic reviews! (Except one, some people have no lives then to give horrible comments to others)

As ordered and promised, I deliver now the next chapter!

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Enjoy!

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When John's scream echoed through her ears, Elizabeth, shocked, pulled back so fast she landed on the floor with a loud thud.

With her, the IV tube had fallen, spilling it's contents along the floor around her.

"John?" She whispered painfully, climbing to her knees to look at him. He was watching her, his wrist in his mouth where it was bleeding from the plastic tube being ripped from his arm.

She noticed his eyes were wide and fearful, and he was backed into the top corner of his bed. Away from her. Feeling her heart rip slightly, she stood up, and took a step closer.

His eyes searched frantically and he backed away further, reaching the end of the bed and falling over the side. Frowning, she walked around slowly, completely at a loss for what was going on.

"John?" She whispered kneeling in front of him. His eyes filled with uncontrollable fear.

"Where's my mom?" He yelled suddenly, as Elizabeth fell backwards. He lurched forward, skirting around to the next bed and hiding in the corner, watching Elizabeth with weary eyes.

As they heart monitor above them began to give off several loud erratic beeps, Carson and some others ran into the room. Seeing the state of chaos, he ordered John back onto the bed. Only to be met by an empty glare.

"Elizabeth?" Carson asked gently, lifting her off the floor as the medical personnel gathered around John in a circle. "What happened?"

Suddenly loud crashes could be heard. As the nurses attempted to get close with syringes full of pain killers, John began to struggle, attempting to escape, pushing people out of the way in his desperate, violent fight.

"Major Sheppard!" Carson snapped, not taking John's silence and odd behavior as anything serious. He took the closest needle and walked forward, grabbing John's arm. In a quick movement, John had brought out his other fist, and Carson was thrown backwards into a collection of medical equipment.

Elizabeth looked at him in quick concern as the nurses and doctors gathered around their unconscious friend, before Elizabeth took a small step toward John.

"John?" She asked gently, taking another smaller step forward as John backed away slightly, "John? Why don't you tell me what's going on? You can trust me. You know that."

John's eyes lessened in fear, as he used his fists to dig at his eyes.

"I want my mom! Where's my mom! Where am I?"

Elizabeth held out her hand, automatically realizing the John Sheppard she knew wasn't here.

With shaking movements, John grasped her hand and pulled her into the corner with him, snuggling into her side and looking fearfully at the doctors who were watching carefully.

"It's going to be okay John." She said soothingly, kissing his hand, "It's going to be okay…"

* * *

Elizabeth stayed with John's terrified form as the nurses and doctors helped Carson onto a bed and held a cold compress to his unconscious head. The nurses had approached several times, trying to get John to move, but each time he dug further into Elizabeth's side and refused to move. Elizabeth herself awkwardly rubbed his back, wondering what on Earth had happened to revert John back into his childhood state.

An hour or so later (To Elizabeth and her hurting heart it seemed more like forever), Carson opened his eyes and climbed to his feet, kneeling in front of the pair with a needle in his hand, as John looked at him, shaking his head in a negative way, his eyes full of fear. Carson threw Elizabeth a knowing look.

"John," Carson whispered, as John's grip on Elizabeth's hand grew tighter, "I need to give you this needle son. It will make you feel better."

John looked at Elizabeth and shook his head again.

"Where's my mom?" He croaked, swiping unsuccessfully at his eyes. Elizabeth wiped away his tears with her thumb. Carson sighed.

"Son, your mother isn't here. She told us to tell you she loves you and asked that you do all me and Elizabeth here says okay?"

John nodded pathetically, sniffling.

"So are you going to let me give you this needle?" Carson asked.

John nodded, holding out his free arm.

Carson nodded and gently injected the substance. John sucked his thumb for a minute.

"Brave boy. You're a very brave boy." Elizabeth said soothingly, rubbing his hair.

John nodded as his eyes drooped shut.

"Mommy said I am brave for an eleven year old…She says one day I'm going to follow in daddy's footsteps…" And with that his eyes shut and he was asleep.

Carson carefully moved forward and with Elizabeth's help, managed to get John onto the nearest bed.

* * *

"What the hell is going on Carson?" Elizabeth asked half an hour later, sitting in the briefing room, Carson, Ford, Teyla, McKay and Bates sitting around her.

Beckett climbed to his feet.

"Well, after John protected you from the fireball," He said in Elizabeth's direction, "I can't pretend to know what the hell happened. I might have missed something, but as far as I know, John had broken ribs, a punctured lung, major bruising and a bruised liver. He had no head trauma, no concussion, no trauma in the head area at all! Even Elizabeth, you commented both his eyes were un-dilated, he was coherent and knew what had happened! It makes no sense to why he should revert to the past!"

Bates looked around for a minute.

"Ma'am, we need to consider the fact of incarceration."

Elizabeth looked up at him sharply.

"What are you saying Sergeant?" Her eyes narrowed and Bates took a cautious look at the annoyed people around him.

"Well ma'am, as you said, if the Major is not himself, not only is he a danger to us, but to himself too. If he were to get out…I also suggest reliving him of his command and having a new military commander in charge."

Elizabeth felt rage pump through her veins.

She stood to her feet, and although she was shorter then most of the others on Atlantis, she still towered over Bates in his chair, and the air around her was terrifying.

"I never want to hear you say that again Sergeant." She said in a deadly whisper. The others would have laughed if the situation not so dire. "While there is a snowball's chance in hell that John is going to get well again, not only is he going to keep is position as military leader, but he'll be free to roam to the halls of Atlantis, in the chance it jogs his memory!"

Bates stood also.

"You risking all of our lives! Sheppard is a risk having him here! If I were leader, I would rather have him killed then laying a price on all our lives! Just because you have feelings for him doesn't mean it should impair your judgment! I have Atlantis well being in mind! And so should you!"

The people around them stood to their feet in anger.

"I," Elizabeth said coldly, "have had Atlantis best interest in my heart since we got here, and don't you dare say anything different! Major Sheppard is one of the best things to happen to Atlantis! Without him, you would be dead, I would be dead and hell, Atlantis would have probably been destroyed by now!"

"I'm not denying he's helped us in the _past_! But now he is holding us down! With him here he's not saving our lives, he's endangering them!"

"Or maybe your just trying to suck up John's position and respect here! Your track record hasn't been well has it? I saw on your file! Your CO's said you think your self important and think your always right! I heard you shot down three of your own helicopters, Because you thought they were the enemy! It's why you got dumped here!"

Bates face slowly went red, holding in his anger. His next words were cold and careful.

"Yes _sir_. But I never had feelings for my subordinate that put hundreds of peoples lives at risk."

A loud slap echoed through the room as Bates put a hand to his bleeding cheek. Rodney gently pulled Elizabeth away.

"The slug isn't worth it Elizabeth." He said gently. Bates wiped the blood onto his jacket.

Rodney glared at him.

"Your dismissed solider!" He said coldly. Bates crossed his arms.

"Your not my CO."

McKay pushed Elizabeth back, stepping in front of her.

"Right now Bates, Since the major in incapacitated, I'm in control! And if you want me to get Ford here to give you the same order as I'm about to give you, so be it. I ORDER you to go to your quarters and stay there until myself or Elizabeth say otherwise!"

Bates nodded stiffly, picking up his papers. As he walked past and out the door, only Teyla heard what he muttered under his breath.

"Stupid cow. We all know she's sleeping with Sheppard."

She frowned in anger. Ignoring it for the moment, she turned back to the group to see Elizabeth's shoulders wracked with small sobs she was desperately trying to force back. Nodding, Teyla took Ford and Carson's hands, dragging them from the room as Elizabeth crumpled in Rodney's arms.

Ttfn!


	3. Chapter three

Stay with me.

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Chapter three.

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Cold…

So cold…

John could feel himself floating along, he had no idea of time or place. He was floating. It was a familiar feeling he knew well from being unconscious. Whatever had happened, he didn't like the sound of it.

Suddenly darkness, so much darkness filled his vision. It was the kind of darkness that you can't see, but you know it's there. It hurt your eyes to stare at such a darkness, and it was surrounding John…Drowning him.

And in his minds eye, suddenly John was thrown back into time, and into his memories.

* * *

Elizabeth held tightly, holding onto John's limp hand. Wires protruded from bandages, the slow steady 'Beep…Beep' of the heart monitor soothed her slightly, but her heart was still beating erratically.

"John…" She whispered, lowering her head so she was half lying on the bed beside his hand. She kissed it, and gripped it tighter. "Where are you?"

Usually she would have been professional. Hell, every other time she had been cold, hiding her emotions until everyone had gone, crying herself to sleep every other time John came back injured, alone in her quarters. When had her feelings changed? When had she started to feel something more then respect for her second? John Sheppard was a great man. He always appeared to people who just met him, shallow. That's what Elizabeth thought when she had first met him in Antarctica. He had swagger and confidence. He had been back chatting and cocky, appearing to be just a stupid flyboy.

But Elizabeth had learned much since then. She had managed to dig beneath his carefree exterior. She had seen him at his lowest points. She had comforted him when he cried, she had soothed his anger, and laughed at his jokes. McKay still thought sometimes he was just another jarhead. But Elizabeth had long known that not to be true.

And she had to admit, more often then not, the minute John Sheppard went off world, she felt this small tug. Anxiousness most people called it. Maybe it was. But anxiousness didn't usually feel like a thousand knives piercing your heart. It didn't make your body numb , and anxiousness didn't usually make the edges around your vision blacken suddenly as your mind suddenly spun with possible outcomes for John Sheppard's life, each more horrible then the last. It was fear. It was fear that one day, he would go out there and not come back.

And it was then, sitting beside a comatose John Sheppard, she realized when that day came, when John's life ended, so would her own. John had become her rock in a wild sea. Her lifeboat. Her savior from the big bad universe.

And more importantly, John Sheppard had become the man she loved.

And with that, Elizabeth Weir, gently fell into the land of nod.

* * *

Carson sighed, looking at the slumping leader of Atlantis, as she whispered a few words to his only patient, her eyes drooping as she slowly leaned down, her head resting on the mattress, kissing John Sheppard's hand before her eyes fluttered shut. He shook his head, walking into the room, gently tucking a spare blanket around her shoulders, her grip on John's hand like vice.

"Poor lass." He whispered, patting her hand, before checking John's vitals. Carson had put the lad in a medical coma, not that he had told Elizabeth this yet. By leaving John in a coma until his injuries healed, he could then be woken and convinced of his real identity without causing more injuries to his already badly hurt body.

* * *

When Elizabeth opened her eyes, she was surprised to be found in a white room. For a minute she thought she had been injured and ended up in the infirmary, when she remembered quite suddenly what had transpired and opened her eyes with a start, looking at the pale hand still clenched in hers.

"John…" She groaned aloud, looking at his face, remembering in vivid detail what had happened as she noticed he was still unconscious.

A blanket had been wrapped around her shoulders, and Elizabeth pulled it off, clambering to her feet. She kissed John on the forehead before turning to leave, ready to head to the control room and take charge. But before that, she wanted an update from Beckett.

Hearing raised voices as she approached his office, she stopped at the sound of her own name mentioned, the not so quite dulcet tones of McKay causing her to shrink into the shadows.

"She's been here all night Carson! You can't tell me the Major thinking he's a kid is normal! If he dies, I don't even want to know what Elizabeth will do! It will be hard enough without him here to help run Atlantis! But with her so worried about John, the bastards like Kavanagh and Bates will try to use it against her. Hell, Bates has already started a small cult trying to get enough people to join. They called it the 'rebellion'. He almost punched in my face when I refused to join."

"Lad, we can't just tell her to get on with her job! We need her, but the man you and I knows she has feelings for is lying in a coma in the infirmary. Wouldn't you be a little distressed?"

McKay moved towards the door, as Elizabeth sunk further in the shadows.

"I know Carson. But if she doesn't get her act together, and soon, Atlantis is going to be as good as gone."

And with that he walked from the room. And as Elizabeth heard Carson sigh, she straightened her shoulders, pushing back her emotions.

First, she was going to have Kavanagh and Bates thrown in the brig.

Then, she was going to get Atlantis, once more, under control.

Then, she was going to help John get his memory back.

And with an air of a woman on a mission, Elizabeth Weir walked from the infirmary, announcing a silent war, on all those gods who decided to make their life as hard as possible.

Ttfn!


	4. Chapter four

Stay with me

Chapter four

A/N: Raising the rating because of the mentioned child abuse. You've been warned.

Elizabeth slouched back into the Infirmary several hours later, her eyes drooping considerately, as she walked past the knowing doctors and nurses and literally fell into the chair beside John's bed.

It had been a rough afternoon. She had talked to Bates and Kavanagh, both who made complaints about her leadership, and insisting a new member took over as head, needless to say, Elizabeth had ordered them both locked in a cell for a few hours to think about things, at which they both let out streams of colourful language and death threats.

If it hadn't been for Ford and Teyla's support, she would have had them both thrown off a balcony.

Sighing, she looked blearily at the beeping heart monitor.

"John…Where are you?" She whispered, her hand finding his cold one.

The only answer she received was silence.

And her eyes slowly shut as she fell into a deep slumber.

_She opened her eyes. Where was she? It was strange, everywhere around her she could only see white. Was it the infirmary? It couldn't be. The walls were never padded. Wait…padded? Uh-oh. Raising herself quickly, Elizabeth found herself sitting on the padded floor, of a room she knew too well. She was in a mental institution. She had been in one once, she remembered clearly. Not because she was insane, but because one of her negotiations had gone extremely wrong in a third world country. They had blamed her, and to stop the United States getting their hands on her, they had locked her in an institution, keeping her drugged, and under the name 'Lana Parker.' A housewife who had tried to take her own life._

_Eventually the war that had erupted calmed down, and Elizabeth was allowed to go free, after negotiations. She had gone to rebuild her life, but continued to be a negotiator, starting small with police matters, and returning to other countries._

_But her padded room had not been so well kept._

_Hearing a sniffle behind her, Elizabeth turned to see a boy huddled in the corner._

_"Hello?" She whispered, taking a small step forward. He sniffled again, and Elizabeth stopped as he rose his head, his eyes red and puffy, full of tears. He had to be about sixteen, his buzz cut black hair reminding her of someone._

_The door behind her opened, the sound of keys in the lock making her turn around as several men walked in, all dressed as military._

_"James." The General said forcibly. The boy quickly climbed to his feet and saluted. "Your mother is here to pick you up."_

_James stayed at attention as Elizabeth narrowed her eyes._

_"Yes Sir!"_

_"WHAT WAS THAT SOLDIER?"_

_"YES SIR!"_

_Elizabeth stepped in front of James._

_"Excuse me sir…"_

_She was cut off as the General took a step forward (walking right through her was shocked to see) and grabbed the boy by the scuff of his top and lifted him off the floor and into the air. Elizabeth turned and watched in horror as he drew back his hand and slapped the boy hard._

_"ARE YOU GOING TO BEHAVE FOR YOUR MOTHER?"_

_The boy turned his head back to the man, his cheek red._

_"YES SIR!"_

_The two men standing behind them turned and walked from the room._

_The General nodded._

_"Good." He threw James down, the boy landing on his hands and knees. "Get changed and get out of my sight. I want you gone by 0400."_

_"Yes sir."_

_"And tell your mother I love her."_

_"Yes sir."_

_With that the man walked from the room, leaving to door open. She turned back and looked at the boy, who was muttering under his breath._

_"I'll give him yes sir alright. Ooo, General Sheppard. He's such a big macho man he can hit his kids and nobody has to care. One day I'll get him back…"_

_Everything suddenly went piercing white as Elizabeth stood in shocked silence._

_General Sheppard?_

_James Sheppard?_

_When everything was back to normal, Elizabeth found herself standing on large pebbles. Next to her was a creek, the water clear and fresh, the small fish swimming around within it visible._

_Behind her stood a house, just a small log cottage, in the open doorway stood a woman with long blonde hair, she was drying a glass with a tea towel and watching something with a smile on her face as she leaned against the doorframe._

_In the water, further down the stream was a small watering hole. The size roughly of a dam, inside was playing two kids, one she recognized as James from the white room, the other she didn't. He was rather like a younger version of James, the same buzz cut, he had to be about eleven or twelve years of age._

_"James!" The boy shouted, "JAMES! CATCH!" He lifted a tennis ball from floating in the water and threw it at the older boy. James caught it with great reflexes._

_The boy grinned._

_"Good throw John!"_

_John?_

_Suddenly a shout came from the house, and a scream that made Elizabeth freeze in terror. The boys stopped laughing and playing immediately, clambering out of the pond and racing to the house, Elizabeth close on their heels._

_As they entered the house, Elizabeth stopped breathing as she noticed the mother lying across the floor. Her head was bleeding and as Elizabeth kneeled down to help, she was frustrated to find she could do nothing but watch the proceedings._

_"Mom?" He littlest boy whispered, kneeling by his mothers feet as the older one sat and cradled his mothers head, their eyes full of terror._

_Loud drunken footsteps could be heard as someone walked through the corridor into the light. The father, the one Elizabeth had seen as the General in the white room, his eyes red from drunkenness staggered into the room._

_The kids looked up at his, their faces contorted in horror as they cried. The father looked down at them._

_"ATTENTION!" He yelled, as both boys jumped to their feet and saluted. John looked down at his mother again, before quickly looking back up at his father. But his father noticed._

_"WHAT DID YOU THINK I SAID! DO YOU THINK I'M NOT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY?"_

_The boy cowered._

_"No Sir!"_

_"WHAT?"_

_"NO SIR!"_

_The father's arm slammed into John's head and he fell to his knees._

_"WHAT DID YOU DO TO THE TV? IT DIED DURING THE SUPERBOWL!"_

_The little boy stood back up._

_"Nothing SIR!"_

_The father laughed, his face red._

_"YOUR LYING! I KNOW YOU ARE! LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO TO YOUR MOTHER!"_

_He slammed his arm into John's head again and to boy fell over once more. Elizabeth felt rage pumping through her veins. She wanted to do something. Stop the dreadfulness that was occurring in front of her. Suddenly a hand grabbed her arm._

_She turned to see a fully grown John Sheppard standing beside her._

_"JOHN!" She whispered, grabbing his hand with hers. He looked at her for a second before indicating back to the even unfolding in front of them._

_"Just watch." He whispered. She looked and was revolted to see the father hitting John again and again._

_James looked panicked, like he was trying to come to a decision, when he ran to the back of the room. The father didn't notice, to intent on hurting the small boy, as the older one opened a closet door and climbed the shelves until he could reach the top one, where he pulled out a shoe box and came tumbling back to Earth. He opened it hurriedly after a small look at his father and his cowering brother, before ripping it open and pulling out a shiny silver handgun._

_He opened it quickly, shivering each time his brother let out a whimper or scream, putting bullets in the chamber and aiming it at his father._

_The General noticed this, and turned to see his other son with the gun._

_"Son…What are you doing with my gun?" He asked menacingly, taking a step toward James, leaving John battered and bleeding on the ground._

_"Son…Give me my gun!" He screamed, walking closer. Elizabeth felt John's hand tighten around her own as they looked on in horror._

_The General suddenly snatched for the gun, but several loud gunshots could be heard and suddenly, the father of the two children was lying on the ground, his eyes closed, blood pooling around him._

_James, covered in his father's blood, blinked several times, before throwing the gun to the side and racing to his brothers side._

_"John! John are you okay?" He whimpered, pulling the boy onto his lap. John's eyes opened slightly._

_"I'm kay…" He whimpered, as his brother wiped at the blood on John's face._

_Elizabeth noticed in horror as the General's hand gently swept out, reaching for the gun in his reach. She wanted to warn them, call out, but she knew it was no use. The general clambered to his feet, Elizabeth knew he couldn't last, his eyes has an unfocused quality. James quickly noticed the approaching man and pushed John behind him. He stood up, a look of anger in his young eyes. The father sneered._

_"Y-You've killed your f-father James." He croaked out, wobbling slightly, "Your m-more like me t-then you liked to a-admit. I made y-you both I-into men."_

_And with that there was a single gunshot, as the world around Elizabeth once again went white. She was standing in whiteness, John still clutching her hand._

_"I lost my entire family that night." He whispered quietly, eyes full of sadness._

_Elizabeth felt an invisibly force slowly pulling them apart._

_"JOHN!" she screamed, "JOHN!"_

But it was too late. When she opened her eyes, she was leaning against John's unconscious hand. She wiped the tears from her eyes.

She had never known.

Ttfn!

A/N: Hope you understand I needed this chapter to get the story rolling. Took me a while to write. I needed to figure out the direction I was taking this story. Look for an update soon and don't forget to review!


	5. Chapter five

Stay with me

* * *

Chapter Five

* * *

When Elizabeth had regained her bearings, she quickly looked around, to find herself alone in the infirmary. What had she just experienced? Was it a dream? It had seemed so real, and when John had held her hand, it had seemed so…true. She had felt the warmness of his skin touching hers. Frowning, Elizabeth suddenly made a decision. Walking from the infirmary, she decided to go check his records for references of John's family. If the vision had appeared real, she could mention it to someone. If not, no one never need know what she had seen.

* * *

Minutes later she was pulling John's file from her cabinet, locked away in her office. Opening it past the pages she had already skimmed through at the beginning of the expedition, she found the small page with information on John's past life before military. 

_**Psychological Evaluation Report**_

_**Doctor. Diana Morgan.**_

_**Name: John Sheppard**_

_**Age: 19**_

_**John Sheppard in my professional opinion is fit to join the USAF. After a long period of assessment, he as proved that after the events surrounding his families death as a child, he has moved on. Although still carrying some guilt over the death of his mother and brother by his fathers hands, he appears not to suffer the same traits. I suggest keeping an eye on him for his period of service.**_

Elizabeth sighed, and rubbed her forehead slightly. Great. So if it wasn't a dream, what was it? A vision? Some kind of strange connection? For now, she decided with a quick glance back at the file, she would keep her little experience to herself. Just in case.

Deciding she would take some time to shower and change out of the old clothes she was wearing, Elizabeth walked from the room, now aware of the person who sneaked from the darkened corner, walking to the computer, and pulling up the report.

He smiled an evil knowing smile.

"I have you now, Elizabeth…" He whispered softly, closing the programs and walking from the room, a spring, now in his diabolical step.

* * *

"So," McKay said in his usually quick voice, "Then the device transmits a secret code with the message back to here, Atlantis, which is then decoded in a matter of seconds and transmitted in an audio format." 

Elizabeth, caught on her way back to the infirmary, looked at his with raised eyebrows.

"So it's a communication device."

"No! It's more then a communication device! It's a CODED communication device!"

Elizabeth frowned, the beginnings of a headache setting in her head as she let out an exasperated sigh.

"And the significance is exactly…?"

McKay looked flustered. He obviously thought the conversation was taking a turn for the worse.

"Well, it's not really the significance as much the interest."

Elizabeth closed her eyes before speaking.

"Rodney, I really have somewhere to be…"

Rodney nodded quickly.

"I know you do! But I just wanted to tell you a quick update! Anyway, that wasn't the real reason I wanted to talk to you. Are you sure your okay?" He asked, laying a comforting hand on her arm, "you look pale."

Elizabeth nodded.

"I'm fine Rodney. Now if you'll excuse me, I really want to get back to the infirmary for a few hours."

McKay nodded.

"Well, I think I'll join you. I haven't seen John in a few days."

As they walked toward the infirmary doors, they were surprised to see one of them swing open suddenly. Shouts filled their ears as an awake John Sheppard ran from the small room.

Elizabeth moved into his path as he stopped and looked around worriedly.

"John?" She half-asked, half whispered hopefully. He looked at her for a long few seconds.

"Who are you?" He asked, narrowing his eyes.

Elizabeth sighed, taking a small step forward.

"I'm your friend John. Your in Atlantis. Your safe here."

John sneered.

"Yeah right. Atlantis. I joined the USAF a few months ago. What kind of frat joke is this?"

Elizabeth reached out for his hand tentatively, but he pulled back quickly. Hurt flashed across her face before she was able to push it back behind the mental barriers she had built around herself.

"Follow me John." She said quickly, motioning with her hand behind her back for Rodney to back off. He did so and Elizabeth held the door open for the infirmary. Nineteen year old John hesitated.

"It's okay," She whispered soothingly, "you have my word no one will harm you. I just want to show you something." He nodded and followed her, past Carson and the nurses who watched them.

Carson's face clearly stated 'I hope you know what your doing'. She led him past the beds and the equipment he had broken in his escape, to the bathroom at the far end. Opening the door, she pointed to the mirror.

"Take a look." She whispered.

Looking suspiciously at her, John squeezed past and looked at himself. In a matter of seconds his face went from suspicious, to shocked. He slowly felt his face, then looked at his aging hands.

"You are suffering a kind of amnesia John." She said gently, "You've been here in Atlantis for nearly a year."

His hand, needing support, reached out blindly for hers. Elizabeth took his hand firmly, but suddenly, just as soon as their hands touched, pain ripped through Elizabeth as her breathing came in short gasps, and her world went white as everything else but her and John fell away into the eerie whiteness.

_Ttfn!_


	6. Chapter six

Stay with me

* * *

Chapter six

* * *

When the sudden burst of whiteness had vanished, Carson adjusted his eyes toward the bathroom, only to see two limp forms sprayed against the hard tile floor. Panicking that in his destabilized state, the Major had done something, Carson rushed forward, nurses hot on his heels as he gently turned Elizabeth over.

Taking her pulse just as gently, he was stumped to see she appeared to have a strong pulse. He pulled out his penlight and shined it into her eyes, as the nurse did the same thing to Sheppard.

"Pupils reactive…Pulse strong…" The nurse said loudly, "It appears he's just…asleep!"

Carson looked over at her, worry crossing his face.

"Get them hooked up to a heart monitor. I don't want to take any chances."

Just as quickly, the medical personnel had both Doctor Weir and Major Sheppard on gurney's, both hooked up with the steady beep, beep, beep coming from their heart monitors.

It was only then that Carson noticed a very shell shocked Rodney McKay standing in the corner of the infirmary, his wide eyes fixed on the now two occupied hospital beds.

Beckett laid a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"What's wrong with them Carson?"

"I don't know. It appears they just fell asleep…I want to have an MRI taken, but with their unexplained unconsciousness, I don't want to risk it. It could be a coma, but there's no indicating to what caused it."

Rodney opened his mouth several times, chocking on words.

"What was the big light?"

Carson shook his head.

"I wish I knew…I wish I knew."

* * *

The bight white flash blinded Elizabeth for several minutes. Blinking her eyes furiously, she was surprised when the floor beneath her feet suddenly lurched sideways, and Elizabeth crumbled to the ground.

As the last dregs of white faded from her vision, she found herself looking at several pairs on military issue boots, inches from her face. Looking up, past their legs and up into their faces, she saw they were wearing large tan coloured helmets, the giant black visors covering their eyes.

The most disturbing thing for Elizabeth, happened to be the rocking of the floor she was still sitting on. It was only then she realised she was in fact sitting in a large helicopter.

"Oh crap." She hissed to herself, climbing to her feet. Sitting gently on the large bench, next to the four men in helmets, she watched toward the front of the aircraft, the pilot and front window. Trees covered the ground below lightly, which seemed to be consisting mostly of sand.

Suddenly the helicopter lurched.

"We're taking fire! Enemy troops on the ground!"

The personnel quickly removed their flight helmets, and Elizabeth's attention was drawn to who seemed to be the youngest of the group, his short spiky black hair drawing her as she suddenly realised.

"John?" He didn't hear her. As two of the others grabbed large M-16's from the back, opening the helicopter door to shoot at the people gathered in grey army trucks below, Elizabeth watched as another grabbed a grenade launched and set up behind the others. In a quick hail of gunfire, the grenade wielding man was lying on the ground, his blood splatter over the walls of the chopper.

"DAMN!" One of the shooting men yelled, "Sheppard! Take over Hank's position!"

John rushed forward, grabbing the grenade launched and stepping over the body, agony written over his face as he took aim.

"FIRE!" the man yelled, "FIRE DAMMIT!"

John quickly let off one grenade, and by chance it landed on the small convey below, as everything went up in flames.

John quickly backed away, tears streaming down his face. Elizabeth had never seen him cry over killing anyone before.

The men dropped the guns and turned to congratulate John, who was now rocking on the bench chair.

"You just killed your first men son!" The commander said proudly, "take it like a man."

John sniffled slightly, as the man thumped his back, and the two others in the plane went forward to wrap 'Hank's' body up.

But Elizabeth paid no heed to them. She was staring at John, who's eyes were fixed on his own hands, covered in blood, he looked like he couldn't believe his eyes.

And as whiteness once again sailed Elizabeth through time, and apparently space, her eyes snapped open, only to find herself nose to nose with Carson Bekett.

"Elizabeth!" He said, quickly leaning back as she sat up.

"Carson." She greeted, as his eyes frowned. "What?"

"You don't seem to surprised that you just woke up from a coma, nor the fact that your in the infirmary."

Elizabeth raised her eyebrows.

"I just woke up from a coma? Hmm…And no welcoming committee?"

Carson's face turned into a scolding look as Elizabeth quickly tried to backtrack.

"Ah, see look at me, I've been spending too much time with John and Rodney. Their attitudes are beginning to grow on me."

Carson raised his finger accusingly.

"This has happened before hasn't it? That's why your not surprised!"

Elizabeth squirmed slightly. In a professional way of course.

"Err…"

"How many times?" He demanded, hands on hips.

Elizabeth smiled innocently.

"Umm…"

"HOW MANY TIMES?"

"Just one I swear."

Carson stared at her.

"And you didn't tell me because…?"

"It was nothing Carson. Really."

"Going into a coma is nothing. Oh yes, happens every day."

"No really Carson, I'm fine. See?" She waved a hand at him. "Fine."

He shook his head.

"Well, If you think I'm going to let you out of here for the next few days, you've got another thing coming."

Elizabeth gently took his hand.

"Come on Carson…look at me. I'm fine. I'll be fine. If it happens again, I'll come see you!"

Carson shook his head.

"No doctor. If I have to put you in restraints to keep you in this infirmary, I will. Now be a good patient and lay back and relax."

Elizabeth frowned.

"More like a lab-rat."

"You have been spending to much time with John and Rodney."

He ducked as Elizabeth threw her pillow across the room.

As he left her alone, Elizabeth settled back into the covers of the bed, wondering whether she should tell someone about her experiences in John's past. Her eyes slowly drooped shut, as the image of John crying in the plane, burned itself into her mind.

_Ttfn!_


	7. Chapter seven

Stay with me

* * *

Chapter seven

* * *

John had tried several things to escape the prison he was currently locked in. Over the borders of Iraq, he had been sent on his second mission (ever) to find and retrieve a missing Captain O'Neill and Colonel Langham. The mission had begun well, they had exited the helicopter and descended over Iraq in parachutes, landing in a large wooded clearing. All four men had collected their guns, and began moving through the brush to the small compound at the given co-ordinates. Well, things had quickly gone sour. One of the group, Captain Sanders, had accidentally trod on a hidden mine, not only giving away their position, but killing two members of their team instantly.

Now in charge, John had ordered Lieutenant Jameson to run for his life back to the chopper pick-up point, but not only did he not make it, they were surrounded in mere seconds by enemy soldiers.

And so they both ended up here, in this crappy little prison, John in one cell, Jameson in the other.

Now, John sat alone, staring at the barred window, looking at the small patch of sky that was visible from his small confines.

He sighed. For some reason he felt…strange. Like he knew he was here, in this prison, but yet, it seemed like he was supposed to be somewhere else. It's almost like he could feel what was going to happen next here. But how could that be?

_"It's quite simple, really."_ The ghostly voice startled him out of his reverie, as he looked around, seeing no sign of the voices owner.

"Who's there?"

_"No one. Well, not no-one…I'm here but I'm not here. You get me?"_

John frowned, quickly and quietly looking around.

"Not really."

_"Oh well, I'm not here to make chit-chat. I'm here to tell you about why you're here."_

"I know why I'm here." John said defensively.

_"Actually, no, you don't. Your mind is withholding the memories of your present, in an attempt to stop you ruining your own timeline. But, the council think you'll be OK, so…I'm going to give you back your memories."_

"Oh, well that explains everything." He answered sarcastically.

_"Stop being a smart-ass. Give me a minute will you?"_

"Says the voice with no owner." John retorted, only to stop as white light filtered through his eyelids. Suddenly remembering Atlantis, he looked around.

_"Where's Elizabeth?"_ He said harshly, looking around.

The disembodied voice chuckled.

_"Now you remember. Elizabeth Weir is fine. Well, that depends how you define 'fine'. Night now someone of…less then good intentions is planning something that involves her."_

John looked around, trying to locate the voice.

"Let me see her."

_"Umm…no. She's not of concern right now."_

John frowned.

"What have you done to me? Why am I stuck here?"

_"Ah. Don't blame us. That was YOUR fault. If you hadn't gone and thrown yourself in front of Elizabeth, your positions would be reversed. And Elizabeth wouldn't be the one in danger."_

John climbed up to the bars of the cell and looked around.

"Why has she been here for some of my memories? And why am I here? How do I get back to Atlantis?"

The deep voice chuckled.

_"Not so fast Johnny boy. Elizabeth was here because right now, you guys are linked with your little side glances and secret touches you share. It's called love A little flaw in our perfect plan I might tell you. Anyway, as for your other questions, we came to your city to help you. We we're originally planning to make your leader replay all her traumatic memories, so she could move on and see the bigger picture involving the wraith. We had no idea of this 'love' and as a result, you were affected instead. The way to leave, accept your pain and move on. It all depends on you."_

John frowned.

"I am NOT in love with Elizabeth Weir. I just…care."

_"Don't even try to lie to me. I'm in your mind. I can see every little dirty thought, every little confession of love, and most importantly, I see those dreams you have often during the nights. So, don't bother trying to dupe me."_

"Great. Not only do I have to replay every horrible event that ever happened in my life, it appears I have running commentary too."

_"You're the one that asked for it."_

"You said something about Elizabeth being in danger?" John said suddenly, recalling the past conversation.

_"Yeah…and?"_

"You have to let me go save her!"

_"Not quite. You've proved to be a valuable asset in Atlantis. Until you've gotten over your pain, you and I are both stuck here."_

John sighed.

"There, over my pain. Can I go?"

The voice laughed.

_"Your no where near it Sheppard. No where near it…"_

And suddenly the voice vanished in a burst of white light.

John looked around, confused for a second, before remembering.

"Oh crap." He whispered, looking around. How did he allow himself to be captured? And Jameson…

"Jameson!" He called, "You okay?"

A muffled voice answered.

"Yes Sir. You?"

"Fine. We're both find. We'll both be okay." He looked around, "We'll both be rescued soon. I swear it."

"I hope so sir."

John took one final look around, before lying back down, feeling no recollection of the voice, or Atlantis.

_Ttfn!_


	8. Chapter eight

Stay with me

* * *

Chapter 8

* * *

SPOILER WARNING! A slight mention of Stargate SG-1 season 9. Just be warned.

The song is by Trademark, Without you.

* * *

_"…Elizabeth Weir is fine. Well, that depends how you define 'fine'…"_

_"…someone of…less then good intentions is planning something that involves her."_

_"She's not of concern right now."_

_…"thrown yourself in front of Elizabeth…"_

_"…Elizabeth wouldn't be the one in danger."_

**_Lately I've been thinking  
About time and how the days went slipping by  
How I was always dreaming  
Of all the places I would see and go in my life  
So many things I meant to do  
Until the minute that I first saw you  
And I made up my mind  
If there's a paradise_**

John woke up with a gasp. The dreams had started a few days ago. He was sitting up in bed, in the Iraq base, behind prison bars trying to make sense of the flashes and memories that seemed to haunt him, none of which, he was sure existed.

_"John?"_

The voice was filled with pain, it hurt him just to hear it, as he felt inside a sudden urge to kill whoever was the result of the voice sounding as it was.

_"John? It's Elizabeth. Can you hear me?"_

Frowning, twisting in his bed sheets he wanted to yell yes, yes he was here, yes he could hear her, but he was mute, like a pillow was placed over his mouth and nose.

_"John. I don't know what's going on exactly, but I want you to wake up. Please? Please don't leave me…please…please…don't…leave…"_

And with irrational fear that consumed him, John's eyes flashed open, only for a single word to roll off his tongue, as he looked at the prone figure sleeping on his arm, wires puncturing his skin.

"Elizabeth…" He whispered, sitting up. She hadn't moved, fast asleep. He glanced around the infirmary of Atlantis.

It was only then, as he looked fully around, that John Sheppard realised, he had left his body lying on the bed behind him.

**_I couldn't find my way there  
I wouldn't want to stay there  
It wouldn't be the same there  
Without you  
See, I'd have no one to hold there  
I'd be all alone there  
Even heaven would be nowhere  
Without you_**

"Elizabeth!" He yelled, panic flooding his systems, not even realizing the lights above him were flashing with his heartbeats. She moved slightly as Carson ran from his office.

"Carson!" He yelled, "Carson?" Carson, looking slightly fearful, ran towards him. John took a step forward to meet him, only to see Carson walk right through him.

"Oh crap." He whispered, as Beckett pulled Elizabeth away from the bed and began checking his body's vitals. Blinking, Elizabeth was up in seconds, fear written on every inch of her face. Beeping filled the room, as nurses ran from each direction, attaching more wires to the body and fitting masks over his mouth and nose.

"Hello?" He whispered softly, turning around, watching as groups of people walked right past and through him. "Hello…?"

He was alone.

_"I told you. I told you couldn't escape without facing each of your worst memories."_ The voice only infuriated John as he swiped at nothingness, trying to find the source.

"Then why am I here?" He ground out, backing away from the crowd.

_"The worst memory you've ever had. Is right here. And it's about to happen."_

"No!" John yelled, "This is where I was before you took me? How can I remember something that never happened?"

_"Are you sure? Let me tell you John, we never took you from this moment. I can tell you for a fact, this memory scarred you for the rest of your days."_

"Why?" John asked fearful.

_"This is the moment, where your heart died and your soul, left."_ The voice said, almost kindly, as it's deep voice reverberated against every wall in the infirmary in this ghostly plain.

**_Staying here is easy  
Cause you know you always keep me satisfied  
There's nowhere that I've heard of  
That could make me leave your love behind  
When you're lying next to me  
I'm right here where I want to be  
I've made up my mind  
If there's a paradise_**

"No." John whispered, realizing the implications as a familiar figure quietly squeezed through the infirmary doors, gun in hand. "NO!" He screamed, taking a step forward as the lights above them exploded, and the group fell to the floor in fright. A part of him knowing it would be useless, John rushed forward in a dive, surprised when flesh hit flesh and Elizabeth fell to the floor as bullets began to roar above them.

Looking at the frightened figure below him, John kissed her gently on the lips and whispered, "I love you." Her eyes staring at him in fear, as he felt himself rise slowly from the floor, turning to the figure standing in darkness.

White light filled the room as all around him watched in shock as John Sheppard, the cocky flyboy turned into a glowing white being. A true ancient. His eyes suddenly took on the appearance of someone with great knowledge, as the bullets that had been flying toward the unarmed group, slowed down, finally falling to the floor as the figure shrunk back in fear. John's voice filled the room.

_"You shouldn't have come here…James."_

**I couldn't find my way there  
I wouldn't want to stay there  
It wouldn't be the same there  
Without you  
See, I'd have no one to hold there  
I'd be all alone there  
Even heaven would be nowhere  
Without you**

Elizabeth, from the floor where Carson had kneeled beside her, fear and wonderment in his eyes as he looked at her, raw fear radiating from her form.

She looked at the figure, a boy, only nineteen or so, but so clearly John's brother.

He evil figure smiled, before black darkness took a similar form to John Sheppard's.

_"Brother. I had to come. Orii business you know."_

_"What, murdering Elizabeth?"_

_"Well, she was in your way."_

_"In my way how? You expected me to turn evil?"_

_"Anger would have consumed you brother, if she died. You would have joined us. But now you love has interfered, and you must die as well."_

John's voice sounded angry, as Elizabeth felt tears run down both her cheeks.

_"Only one will die today, and I am afraid it has to be you James. Why did you do this? Why did you join ones who we once would have hated?"_

_"WE ARE STRONGER!"_ James voice screamed, as the humans in the room covered their ears, as Atlantis alarms began to blare.

_"So this is about father."_ John said calm once more. _"I still sense goodness in you James. Come to our side. Father has moved on. He can no longer hurt us."_

_"He still hurts us to this very day! You do not see it because you are weak! You with your ties to humanity!"_

Elizabeth could have swore she felt a ghostly hand run along her cheek. She placed her hand where she had felt it, knowing it had been John as Carson stared at her behavior strangely.

_"What would mother have thought?"_

_"MOTHER IS DEAD BECAUSE OF HIM!"_

_"James. Mother is dead. Just like father."_

_"NO!"_ Lightning, as black as night struck out wildly into the walls on the infirmary, as several people dived out of the way of falling debris.

The lightning, more concentrated, lashed out in the direction of Elizabeth, as John, or John spectral being, used his arms to intercept it.

_"You will not hurt them."_ John said calmly, as his friends looked on in awe and fear.

_"Then I will hurt you!"_ The voice of James had suddenly turned dark and deep, as the two bright beings of light joined into one grey light, the most disturbing things, the screams that echoed through the silent room. The walls began to shake, people too afraid to move, as lights and pieces of the wall began to tumble down. Then suddenly it was over. White light refilled the room, as John's white 'hands' reached out along the ceilings, keeping it up.

_"Go."_ His voice said gently, as people ran for the exits, the room shaking more and more. Elizabeth swore she heard in her own head _"I'm sorry Elizabeth."_ As Carson and Ford dragged her from the room.

Before the room collapsed, and the people now gathered outside, stared in shock.

**_An island in the blue sea  
A paradise it might be  
But that means nothing to me  
Without you_**

Carson carefully took his coffee which Elizabeth had brought him. The burning taste left a lot to be desired, but he still sighed in content, leaning against his shovel. Excavation work had begun, as everyone in Atlantis pitched in to clear the wreckage, and at the moment, it was Carson, Rodney, Ford, Teyla and Grodin who were on call to continue the digging for their shift. Elizabeth sighed.

"How's it coming?" She asked as they watched the others dig.

Carson looked at her in concern.

"Slowly." He whispered, looking into her eyes. Since the incident where John Sheppard had ascended, Elizabeth had become emotionally-detached. Her eyes, once full of hope and laughter, were hollow, sparking to life very rarely.

"Are you alright, Elizabeth?" He asked, gently, as she took a sip of her own coffee. She side-glanced him and nodded.

"I'm fine Carson. Really." Well aware she was far from fine, he nodded.

"I've Found something!" Rodney suddenly shouted, dropping his shovel and digging with his hands as everyone ran forward to surround him.

"It's a…leg?" The muddy and battered leg poked out through the wreckage, as Elizabeth dropped her cup, not noticed as it shattered on the ground. The worked quickly, more and more people coming to help as the body slowly emerged, Elizabeth not leaving her spot as the pulled the body free.

Tears filled her eyes as she stared at the lifeless eyes, looking up at her.

"It's James." She whispered, kneeling down with Carson as she closed his eyes, his blood wiping onto her finger tips. She stared at it before a voice suddenly broke through her thoughts.

"I have another one! Blimey! He's alive!" Elizabeth stood up suddenly, running to where a second person was pulled from a pocket beneath a piece of wall. Covered in bruises, and quite obviously naked, Elizabeth stared at the figure as everyone looked on in shock.

"John?" She said suddenly throwing herself down and pulling at his shoulder, pulling him from the fetal position he was curled in, and looking into his eyes.

"John!" She yelled, life exploding into her eyes, "John is it really you?"

John stared at her, cocking his head to the side slightly as people began covering him in blankets.

"Who are you?" He asked, his eyes showing no recognition. Elizabeth took a deep breath, a smile breaking into her features.

"John…" She said gently, brushing his hair from his forehead, "John…"

**_I couldn't find my way there  
I wouldn't want to stay there  
It wouldn't be the same there  
Without you  
See, I'd have no one to hold there  
I'd be all alone there  
Even heaven would be nowhere  
Without you_**

Ttfn!


	9. Chapter nine

Stay with me

* * *

Chapter 9

* * *

From his vantage point, the man watched as Elizabeth conversed quietly with the Major. His eyes were drinking in every detail of her, but they had no recognition in them as Elizabeth told him basic details of Sheppard's life. Her eyes were filled with understanding, and what was it? He knew. It was love. The man wrinkled his nose, staring at them from the shadows of the infirmary, waiting for his chance. Elizabeth finally turned away, walking from the immediate room to get Sheppard a glass of water. The darkened figure took this opportunity to leap from the shadows, as John Sheppard jumped in fright. The figure used his finger in a quiet gesture, before several other figures crept from the shadows behind him. He made a gesture with his hands as the other figures quickly darted around the room, as the leading figure made his way to John Sheppard's bedside. Pulling something from his pocket, he whispered something in Sheppard's ear, before handing the object in question to the very confused patient.

It was only then as the sound of Elizabeth's returning footsteps reached their ears, that the lights were flicked off and everyone jumped into hiding. Sheppard laid down, the object he had been given now hidden under his blankets as Elizabeth returned to her seat beside him. It was quick movements that he reached out, despite her surprised gasp, and flicked the object on her head. The lights were switched on, and giving her the fright of her lifetime, Rodney McKay leapt from his hiding place, closely followed by the others that had joined them, each yelling in sequence 'SURPRISE'. Elizabeth looked confused for a minute, feeling the paper birthday hat that had been shoved on her head by the Major, looking around in surprise.

She smiled, before looking back at John, who although could not remember his own name let alone someone's birthday, leaned forward, kissed her innocently on the cheek and said a quick 'happy birthday' as people crowded around with various food. She smiled, and looked genuinely happy as Ford and Teyla cranked up the party-ness, more and more people drifting in from various parts of Atlantis, some even laden with gifts that made been made in the mainland. John was shoved into a wheel chair and wheeled around to meet several people he once knew, finally getting so confused about names and places people kept talking about, he wheeled himself onto the adjacent balcony, watching the sea in the late evening that it was, the sun giving the sky and surrounding clouds a red tint.

There was a warm breeze drifting in, and John stared at the sight before him before he felt a voice whisper into his ear.

_"Is everything clearer now? Do you see why we put you through what we did?"_

John looked down, unbeknownst to anyone else as white light shone behind his eyes. He looked beside him, where a familiar, ghostly figure was standing, watching him. He smiled.

"Yes. Everything is clearer then it was before." The figure nodded.

_"The one thing that you needed to look-for, was the one thing you couldn't see. You feared it, and avoided it with all costs. We needed to show it to you. It completes you. It makes you human. If you were without it, if you continued to hide from it, to avoid it, you would be no better then the enemies that lie in wait for you. Now you have something to hold onto."_

John nodded slightly.

"Still, there had to be an easier way. I mean, come on!"

The voice laughed, before the figure faded from sight. John sighed.

"Thanks _mom._"

Smiling once more at the view in front of him, John climbed to his feet. Pushing the wheel chair away, he moved into the room amid astonished stares of those around him. A path was made as people who saw his determined stared fell silent and in front of him, he could see Elizabeth Weir's back. She had not seen him, but as McKay, Ford and Teyla who were talking to her fell silent, each watching him, Elizabeth turned around, her mouth dropping open watching him approach.

"John?" She asked, as he stopped in front of her, watching her face. "What's wrong?" He smiled and looked down, breaking their eye contact and took her hand, before looking back into her eyes.

"Elizabeth Weir," He said, as her other hand rested on her heart and her eyes looked hopeful, "_I love you_."

And he kissed her. So shocked was she, and the people around them, that when he pulled away, staring once more into her eyes, she could only stare.

She looked unsure, no doubt wondering if his memory had returned, so taking her hands, both of them, in his, he smiled.

"I _always_ loved you." He whispered, and making the connection, the people around them began to cheer.

With a grudging attitude, Rodney pulled out a mars bar from his pocket and handed to Ford with a glare, who in turn was grinning widely. John looked at them.

"What did you do?" He asked, wrapping his arm around a still shocked Elizabeth. Ford grinned, glancing once at the candy bar before handing it to John.

"Good to have you back sir." He said with a grin, turning and retreating from the room. Rodney nodded, muttering something about 'the bet was unfair' as he left, until finally, it was only John and Elizabeth left.

"H-How?" Was all Elizabeth could ask, as John wrapped her arm over his shoulder and took the other one in his hand, moving to a slow dance even though there was no music.

John smiled,

"I had a nice talk with an old friend, who pointed out that life can be way to short."

Elizabeth shook her head and smiled.

"Your amazing you know that?"

He shook his head.

"Never doubted it, Lizzie."

She raised her hand threateningly.

"You call me that again and I'll make sure you lose your memory permanently."

"Liz?" He asked, eyebrows raised, "Eliza? Beth?"

Elizabeth shook her head but didn't respond, instead resting her head on John Sheppard's chest.

* * *

_"Simon,_

_I'm sorry you have to hear this way. I didn't want to tell you through a letter, but once again it is the only way I can make contact. I know last time in the video I told you to move on without me. And I stand by that decision. I'm sorry. I really hope you have moved on for your own sake, because, no matter what, I'll always care about you. I wanted you to know I met someone. He's someone here in Atlantis, someone who's been what I've been through, who I love and loves me in return. We've been married now for three months, or as married as you can be where we are. I wanted to tell you in person, to tell you I'm sorry for everything I've put you through, but I can't return for reasons out of my control. I hope one day you will forgive me,_

_Elizabeth  
__Sheppard."_


End file.
